In the News........

Good afternoon (or morning or night) good people. It is a lovely day in NYC. The sun is shining, the birds are chirping (and shitting on some poor unsuspecting fool's car) and God woke me up, after a very strange dream, for another day. Today's post is about newsworthy events, or rather, events that have been in the news lately, because God only knows, all that bull dung that is on TV or in print aint newsworthy.

I will bullet the items I choose to discuss then expound on them in numerical sequence that corresponds to the bulleted order, ok? And for you short bus bastards I will also color code them.

• Richard "Dick" Grasso, former chairman and chief executive of the New York Stock Exchange from 1995-2003, and the verdict that allows him to keep his $187.5 million dollar severance package
• A woman (somewhere in the US) passed away after drinking torch oil she mistook for apple juice
• The Shaq Rap

1. Ok, first of all how did Dick Dandy come to head the New York Stock exchange? I've read varying stories that have him as a high school dropout and/or having gone to college for 2 years. So you're telling me that I busted my arse in undergraduate and graduate school to get a job that pays $.28 cents above minimum wage, that when i retire, I will have to supplement my income selling bootleg Newport cigarettes on 125th street in Harlem? As Don King would say, "ONLY IN AMERICA!" Ok, the background is that his severance & retirement package from NYSE was $187.5 mil, approved by the compensation chair of NYSE, who happened to be the CEO of Home Depot, where Grass sat on the board of directors. Former NYS Attorney General/Client No. 9 Elliot Spitzer sued because he smelled something fishy and it wasnt his fingers (or maybe it was). First court ruled in favor or Grasso, second in favor of NYS, this court upheld the first decision. So families in NYC go on starving, homeless and such and the NYSE hands this bastard $200 mil....NICE!
2. It is indeed a tragedy and I send my condolences to her family and friends, BUT, how do you mistake torch oil for apple juice? True, they are similar in color but didnt it taste a tad bit funny?
3. Kobe, tell me how my ass tastes! LMAO......I cant even finish writing....that shit is hilarious.

and I'm gone...